Reflections

Reflections of a Father

Healing and Hope Fathers' Retreat Day - for Fathers of Survivors 

I am not sure how XX could have engaged in Healing and Hope without the advent of the Royal Commission in 2013. This was a transformative event in our lives.

It opened windows into support networks (giving and receiving), legal remedies, and engagement with Geelong Grammar School.  The Commission hearings exposed XX to the School as an institution, and its representatives, through a different and at times confronting lens. 

XX’s interaction with the School over time has moved from being adversarial and transactional, to a relationship containing elements of respect, consideration, and care.  Counselling had a big part to play in breaking down psychological barriers and enabling trust to be re-established.

We, as parents, became more involved in the post-settlement "restorative" phase. There was now a more open communication. We were able to provide input into and challenge ideas in a less threatening and constructive way.

In this instance, time has been a healing factor.

I am happy to do what I can to advance the work of Healing and Hope.

August 2023

Reflections of a Mother

Healing and Hope Mothers' Retreat Day - for Mothers of Survivors 

It was a very intimate and special time, and I didn’t realise how much I needed to be able to talk about my family’s experience with other mothers who understood instinctively.

Meeting Rebecca, and hearing the sincerity with which she spoke, went a long way towards helping me to build a more positive feeling towards GGS. 

The warmth and genuine-ness (is that a word??) of all the Healing and Hope team made it very easy for your guests to relax, and participate in the discussions. It never ceases to amaze me how a group of women who don’t know each other can very quickly establish trust, and then feel comfortable about sharing deeply personal stories. I’m so glad to have been asked to participate, and I know that the benefits will continue to reveal themselves as I reflect upon what I learned. 

November 2022

Reflections of a Survivor

Healing and Hope White Balloon Day Event 

Thanks for your help in rebuilding me over the past four years to the point where I was ready to go to the White Balloon Day, and for the reassurance you gave me yesterday.

I was finally able to tie a ribbon on the Lunan gates, where I was disappointed once before when they had all been removed just before I went. It was a powerful kind of solace along with the affirmation of the whole event beforehand.

From now on I will try to go every year it is held at Corio.

September 2022

Reflections of a Survivor

Panic attacks and triggers

Just recently, I was able to identify, control my anxiety from a familiar trigger, and refrain from having a panic or anxiety attack.

There are many factors that produce a panic attack. You could also say that an episode will feed itself and becomes a threshold effect if it isn’t controlled. Unfortunately, anxiety breeds anxiety and so on. 

Identifying triggers is the first and foremost in prevention. Avoid reaction from certain comments or the personal opinion of others. Avoid circumstances where you may find yourself being intimidated.

Familiar nasty situations and people need to be avoided as much as possible. It's not being tough to endure unpleasant situations, just in case you may anticipate feeling stronger for it.  It’s just not worth it. If your gut tells you that this isn’t going to be a good situation, then it probably won’t be.

In instances where you have no defence, as I have often found myself in, other measures have to come into place. Remove yourself.  Just walk away. Tell yourself that it is not your problem or your behaviour. Don’t own the behaviour or opinions of other people. They belong to them. They will never belong to you.